


Waiting For Nothing

by WantToGetLost



Series: Liar, Liar [2]
Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Angst, M/M, One Shot, drunk!Harry, i think, kind of, liar!louis, sort of
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-04
Updated: 2013-10-04
Packaged: 2017-12-28 08:40:31
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,652
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/989998
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WantToGetLost/pseuds/WantToGetLost
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Louis is over Harry, at least he thinks so, he's not sure.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Waiting For Nothing

Louis blames his father for his urge to lie, or well, blames him for starting that. When he was little, Louis’s never really gave attention to him, and Louis did everything he could to change that, did well in school, never got in trouble, but when all that didn’t work, he turned around. He started to get in fights in school, lie to his mother and him, and that’s when his father gave him attention. Being bad worked, specially lying, so Louis did just that. He lied and lied, and when his father walked out on his family, he couldn’t stop then, it became almost an instinct, like second-nature.

 

And all because his dad didn’t appreciate the amazing little boy he had, but in some ways, at the same time, Louis blames himself. He craved attention, more specifically, he craved attention from someone that didn’t care about it, and that drove him over the age because he was so _naïve_ and thought he, himself was the problem, when he wasn’t. It was his father, he was never a good dad, and that ruined Louis so much because he needed a dad to be there when he went to his first match and won for his team, or when he made in the honor role year after year, he got accepted into his dreamed university, he needed to see those proud of eyes that only a father could give to a son. Don’t take him wrong; he loved this mother, very dearly. He tried to stop lying for her, but when he didn’t succeeded at that, he tried his best at school, to at least make his mother proud and be a good example for his sisters, it was not there fault their older brother was a fail, so Louis tried to make his mother proud, but that wasn’t enough for him.

 

After Harry left him, after that horrible afternoon, Louis realized the reason he stopped lying when Harry started to go out with him, because Harry gave him that attention, because Harry was proud of Louis in every single way, Harry gave Louis that attention he wanted so much when little.

 

It was no surprised that after Harry left Louis, he felt miserable and lonely, Harry was his life and he walked out of his the second problem arose. Louis refused to give in to lies, and somehow, the image of Harry someday coming back keeps him sane, keeps him from saying lies.

 

But that isn’t enough, he needs Harry. He needs to see Harry’s bright smile, he needs to able to wake up every morning to those blazing green eyes, he needs to hear that soothing voice again, _he needs to._

Harry didn’t come back, not after Louis pleaded him, not after all the voicemails he left and all the times he called crying for Harry to come back, and Louis gave up. Because if Harry looked at him with those cold eyes, it meant he wasn’t loved anymore, and he preferred to remember those eyes full of love and hope looking at Louis than those cold eyes that stared back at him when he pleaded Harry to come back.

 

Louis felt like he was drowning again, drowning in a sea of emotions. He couldn’t breath without Harry. He was oxygen and Louis needed him.

 

Louis realized that if Harry left him, it meant he never really loved Louis like he liked to believe, and that just broke his heart more because he let himself fall so hard and so innocently like he had never fell from anyone, in fact, Harry was Louis’ first love, and Harry claimed that same, but Louis doubted that now, at least 2 months after Harry walked out him.

 

“Louis, mate.” Liam, one of Louis’ friend he met at his first year in uni, said.

 

Louis blinked a few times, looking up from his notebook and smiled up at Liam. “Yeah?”

 

Many times Louis wondered why he didn’t fall for someone like Liam, who was stable in his life and there for him whenever he was needed, no matter whatever shit Louis has put him through, but Louis realized he wasn’t for Louis, because Liam was too quiet, and too preserved, and perfect for Niall, his other mate. He sighed again, trying to get those thoughts out his head.

 

“Niall just texted me if we want to go down to the café that just opened a few blocks from here?”

 

Louis didn’t waste time to close his book, jumping to his feet, saying, “Tell him we’ll be there right away,” He needed a break from studying, he needed to clear his head, and he reckons spending time with his two best friends is good, even though Niall and Liam are sick to watch with all their blushing and shit, but even though Louis says its disgusting, he cant help but to think he wished that was him and Harry.

 

“Okay,” Liam said, a smile playing in his lips as he texted Niall back and Louis rolled his eyes, remembering that he used to act that way too when he and Harry first started dating, so he closed his eyes again, because it was hard to think about Harry this days without his heart aching and his eyes stinging with tears and his mind playing moments with Harry he so longed now.

 

He was so depressed lately.

 

He shook his head, putting his books on the table and turning around to see Liam looking at him with intense eyes, studying him. “Can I help you?” Louis muttered as he passed him to get to the door, Liam following behind.

 

“I was thinking,” Liam answered slowly, choosing his words carefully. “You are – I think that you are better off without Harry,” He swallowed in nervousness, waiting for Louis to turn around and yell at him.

 

Louis’ breath caught in his throat, blinking slowly as he turned around to face his best mate. He bit his lip, “I think so too,” He said before turning around sharply and opening the door of his shared flat with Liam and walking out.

 

Liam didn’t move from his spot, he really didn’t expect that response, he expected something like crying and him throwing a fit, and then Liam felt a sense of proudness, it seemed like Louis was over Harry.

 

Louis thought so too, until later that night, after Niall had talked him into going to the club with him, he saw Harry drunkenly dancing with a girl. He was drowning again, he felt desperate and short of breath as he looked at Harry again. He felt sick, so sick in his stomach. He ran out of there, trying to breathe pure air again. He made his way to the parking lot, and crumbled on the ground again, this time tears falling down.

 

He couldn’t believe Harry was over him so fast, here he was, thinking maybe he had finally moved on, but Harry was there again, tugging him back like a puppet and Louis hated that, he thought maybe all the love he had for Harry turned into hate, he sure hopes so.

 

As he fumbled to find his phone to text Niall and Liam he was leaving, a voice made him stop.

 

“Louis?”

 

He swallowed a lump in his throat as he saw Harry drunkenly walking over to him, staggering a little.

 

“What do you want Harry?” Louis muttered, trying to swallow the tears as he got up from the floor.

 

“I just – “ Harry started, but cut himself off as he hiccupped. “Wanted to know if – if that bloke there was your boyfriend now.”

 

Louis felt some sort of satisfactory at knowing Harry still cared about him a way. But he was against lying, and he wouldn’t do it even if he knew he could hurt Harry a fraction of how he hurt Louis. “No, its Liam. Remember him? Before you walked out on me? He’s my best mate, and he’s dating Niall anyway.” Louis responded honestly. 

 

He saw as Harry closed his eyes and opened them again, “You don’t understand, I never wanted to leave you,”

 

Louis shook his head, he was not falling for him again, he wasn’t. “Don’t say lies to me Harry, please.”

 

“I’m not,” He hiccupped again. “I had to leave you, my dad – he told me he couldn’t have a gay son,” He whispered, “He said I had to leave you or otherwise he would stop paying uni for me, I’m sorry Louis. I really am, I loved – no, I love you so much Louis. You have to forgive me, I now realized you are far more important. I used Nick telling me that you cheating on me as an excuse. Please Louis, forgive me. I love you.”

 

Louis’ breath hitched at his throat as he struggled to find the words. “Harry…I – I don’t love you anymore,” He said.

 

Harry shook his head violently, “No, I know you still love me! I know you do!” He shouted desperately, and even though he was drunk, well half drunk, he still felt his heartbreak and the tears.

 

“No, Harry, You forgot something, I don’t lie anymore,” Louis took a step back, “And when I say I don’t love you, it means I don’t.” He turned around, smiling to himself because he did it, he was over Harry. He just needed closure; he just needed to know the reason why.

He couldn’t forgive Harry, because if that ever happened to Louis, he wouldn’t have walked out on the love of his life, he wouldn’t dare to. And if Harry managed to do that, it mean he never loved Louis enough. Louis knew he could do better, so he didn’t forgive, but he is surely going to forget.

 

He was over and done with Harry. And he knew that was true because –

 

\- because he doesn’t lie anymore. 

**Author's Note:**

> i dont like couple-happy endings okay


End file.
